Sunday, February 19, 2012

There are no words…

That can describe my feelings and emotions as I write this.  I am completely overwhelmed and the lump in my throat continues to take my breath away.

This is what was waiting for me on our dining room table upon arriving home at around noon on Friday.  You could have bowled me over with a feather.

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I am not going to lie to you all but it’s taken me until this morning to feel well enough to open all your cards and gifts.  Thankfully, the nausea held off long enough to allow your many rays of sunshine in to brighten my day.

spring floral divider

Of course Frankie had to check out what all the fuss was about and wouldn’t stand still for even a moment while I tried to snap a picture. 

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I opened and read each and every greeting and sentiment and lingered upon each and every word.   Even now my eyes are red from the many tears of gratitude that were shed as I read them all.

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And then…

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This was the last gift that I opened this morning, probably because it was in the largest box and like a child at Christmas, I saved the biggest until last.  It’s a good thing that you weren’t all here because I totally lost it…but in a good way!  Mr. Painted Quilt is a pretty strong guy but he had tears in his eyes as well.  I have to share the words that were pre-printed on the card that accompanied the gift.

“Often it’s the time between treatments and tests,

bad days and good,

worry and relief

that can be the most challenging.

As you move through

this hard time,

 I hope you’ll find

moments of grace

when you need them most.

Thinking of you

and praying for good news.”

Thank you Jean.

spring floral divider

I received a ton stuff including cards, fat quarters, sock yarn, wool, pin cushions, pillows, hearts, Valentine socks (the radiation technician gals are going to love them), a hand made fabric post card, magazines and a slew of ‘bits-and-bobs’. 

When I’m back at home and feeling better, I am planning to have a photo parade in order to share with you all the wonderful surprises that found there way here to our home in Nova Scotia.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!  I don’t know if I would have made it this far without you all.

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Two weeks left!  My fifth and final chemo treatment is tomorrow then all that will remain are the final eleven radiation treatments.   It has NOT been an easy journey.  Along with the nausea and vomiting, I now have severe radiation burns that I’m told will only worsen during the last two weeks. 

However, I’m on the downside and there is no looking back now.  I’ve made it this far and have no intention of throwing in the towel.  Heck, I’ve got waaaay too much fabric and too many projects are just waiting to get started!  Besides, spring is just around the corner and I can’t wait to start playing in the dirt.

With much love, gratitude and affection,

Kaarenheartname

76 comments:

My Life and Quilting on the Cape said...

Hi Kaaren... You are more than welcome...The angel and the card brough tears to my eyes as well and I thought of you and all that you are going through.. I thought the angel could help you through... We are so proud of you for taking it to the end... Hang in there and prayers are still comming you way... Hugs :)

Linda said...

YOU GO GIRL! The next two weeks will just fly by. You are a tropper. We are not ready to let you go....You are in our hearts and prayers.

Me and My Stitches said...

This is scary...I was just sitting here thinking of you and wondering how you were doing when your post popped up! Thanks for checking in...hang tough - we are all thinking of you. Hugs and prayers to you!

Taryn said...

Only two more weeks. There are so many of us who tell ourselves that because we look forward to your new posts telling us you are on the mend. You are a talented and strong woman and I think of you when I need a boost of strength and courage. Thanks for checking in when you are able. I am so sorry things will worsen for awhile but here's hoping the better days come very soon. My prayers are with you.

Lori said...

What a beautiful sentiment from Jean. It has to feel good to be on the downhill side of your treatments. Still praying.

GerryART said...

Hugs, Love and lots of STRONG, Positive Thoughts being sent in your direction.
My Friend Betty [luv2sew] showed her version of Raggedy & Friends at Quilt Club yesterday and all sorts of great comments about you were exchanged.
Your Creative Goodness is appreciated far and near.

with All My Love,
Gerry

Just Ramblin' said...

Hi Kaaren. What a trooper you are! So happy only one more chemo treatment. We celebrated when I finished my last one. I sympathize with the nausea and vomiting. It is no fun. But,soon the good days will out weigh the bad and the burn from radia1tion will fade. Although it wasn't fun either, it was better than chemo. Hang in there and keep fighting. You are a winner and inspiration to all of us. Hugs, Nola

Lesley said...

How wonderful that you have felt well enough, even for a blip of time, to say hello and thanks. You are the amazing one in this story and you are so close now! You will continue to be in our prayers and we look forward to seeing your first finished project after your journey to recovery.
Be well!

Happy Cottage Quilter said...

May the Lord bless you and give you the strength you need for the next two weeks. We are all praying for a good report. Just remember that there are many of us thinking of you and praying for you.

Ter'e said...

I started crying when you started crying. Then I couldn't even read your precious words. Then when you read the saying on the card that came with the angel, I started bawling.
Two weeks...............baby girl.......you've got it in the bag now. I swear, we will all pray you right thru these 2 weeks.
I am so, so, so very proud of you. You are just such a champion, in our eyes.
Yeh honey.............we need you around about 25 more years!!!!!
Love you my sweet girl.

Ter'e said...

P.S. Shoot.
I was so thrilled to see your post this morning. It was better than Christmas!

Give my love to Mr. Sam too.......Mr. PQ........what a precious guy he is for keeping all your goodies secret.

KUDOS to strong husbands!!!!!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Bertie said...

Well deserved after what you have been through!!
Take care:))

Beverley said...

The darkest part of the night is just before the dawn. You will soon be in the sunshine sewing some super new quilts and feeling sew much better.

Angie said...

Sending love and light and precious healing thoughts to add to the others'...

LesQuilts said...

Hi Kaaren!
You are a trooper, 66% percent of the way there! I feel for you with all the nausea and the wounds...
You have been in my thoughts and prayers for the past few wks, maybe all our thoughts and prayers are what helped you through to today!
Take care, Leslie

andsewon said...

Praying for strength to carry you through these last two weeks and beyond.

Donna~~ said...

For every lovely gift you've received, know that many other wishes, prayers, hugs and hopes are sent your way. Hope you have an easy two weeks! Big hug!

nlcalendar said...

So glad to read your blog this morning. I check often to see if you post. Shelley (Red Quilts) keeps us up to date when she hears from you. You are a very strong gal. That angel was lovely and like everyone else brought a tear to my eye. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. Take care, Marilyn

Janet O. said...

Been wondering how things are going for you. Oh, that angel was inspired! What bounties of love have come your way. You know we love you, pray for you, and look forward to your full recovery!!

WoolenSails said...

Kaaren,
It is so wonderful that you can come home to find such wonderful gifts from your friends around the world and something to make your day, a little better. I just found out my sister has cancer, so I am busy working on a comfort quilt for her. You are always in my thoughts and prayers.

Debbie

Diane H said...

Very happy to have an update, dear Kaaren. Hang in there - your almost finished. Will keep on praying for you.

Deb said...

I hope that the next two weeks fly by and in a few weeks you'll be feeling much better and can get outside and play in the dirt. Just make sure you save time to play in your sewing room as well.

Deb said...

I hope that the next two weeks fly by and in a few weeks you'll be feeling much better and can get outside and play in the dirt. Just make sure you save time to play in your sewing room as well.

Julie said...

I have only recently discovered your blog, and love it.
You are almost there! I am praying for you as you go through these treatments. I have to confess, the picture of all those cards and gifts brought a tear to my eye also. Just hang in there!

Colleen said...

There is another side! Just remember when you are at your lowest, your last treatment(boy do I remember that!), there is an upside. I used to talk to God alot, reminding myself that her never gives us more then we can endure. After treatment-babysteps, just keep going and it DOES get better.

Ulla said...

Warmest hugs to you!

gracie said...

Keeping you in my thoughts....

barcord said...

You are one brave lady Kaaren. That treatment is not for the faint hearted. You've a few more hurdles. Praying for ease from the radiation burn and peace in your heart along this journey. Much love.

KaHolly said...

You are in my thoughts every day.

janzi said...

How brave you are,.,, obviously all your blogger friends think so too... so although I am late in joining in, I do hope you will feel a hundred percent better tomorrow and the days afterwards.. this treatment is awful I have heard, but if it gets you better- its best to get it over with... thinking of you, Janzi

Kathy H said...

So glad to hear from you. I hope the next two weeks will fly by. I keep you in my prayers.

Grandma M said...

It's so good to hear from you. Hang in there...the end is in sight. You are missed. Thoughts and prayers go out to you.

Robin at The Primitive Hutch said...

Isn't it a nice feeling to have so many friends that care about you and some or most of them you don't even know other than comments and visiting blogs. The friend connect is so strong here in blogland. Prayers and thoughts will continue to flow your way. It sounds like you have the strength to carry on ~ But if or when the road gets a little steeper know that we'll be behind you pushing you the rest of the way! You go girl!!!
Prim Blessings my friend!
Robin

Debbie said...

God's grace is sufficient he is with us always. Praying for the next two weeks to fly by and for you to be back home. Debbie

Candace said...

Friendship is the strongest healer of all - and you have no shortage of friends, Kaaren! You're "over the humnp" now! Before you know it you'll be puttering around in your beautiful garden which Frankie and Mac in tow. Mr. Squash and I wish you the best in the coming weeks - we think of you in our hearts each and every day!
Cheers!

Shakerwood said...

Bloggers and quilters are very special people ..... as are you. Be brave, girlfriend!

Stephanie said...

Sweet gifts to let you know how much we care.

Quilt Hollow said...

You are well loved by many....it shows! Just two weeks YAY!!!! We are all wanting to see you play in dirt soon too!!

pinsandneedles said...

Such a sweet sentiment and beautiful angel from Jean. I admire your strength and courage as you go through these procedures. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers as you finish your treatments. Blessings to you!

Amparo said...

Siento no hablar ingles para comunicarme contigo, pero desde el fondo de mi corazon espero que te recuperes porque no puedes imaginar los buenos momentos que he pasado leyendo tu blog. Muchos besos y mucha fuerza!!!!

Anonymous said...

Hello Kaaren, So thrilled that you are coming along well on this painful journey to a cure!
You are so welcome for the small gifts we sent ♥
Nova Scotia seems like such a long way from me in Montana, but kindred hearts know no boundaries!
Be strong the week and the weeks ahead as you finish up the chemo+start the radiation! I will be praying for you for endurance and the cure. Love,Linda Douglas

tpott said...

Nausea, vomiting and burns, but on the upside only 2 weeks left. Rest and sleep they helped me. I wish I could blink and make 2 weeks disappear and have you seeing the other side. Great days are in your future, you'll see. It really does get better, I promise. I'm so glad the gifts made you smile. Thank you for keeping us up to date, I know it wasn't easy to do. You have so many people praying for you and so many people who care. Hugs, Toni Anne

Bunny said...

How wonderful for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I pray that this pause and pain will be gone with all your treatments. Enjoy your gifts of love. Hugs Bunny

Anonymous said...

Keeping you in my prayers. Stay strong.

Hugs and prayers,
Darlis

Susannah said...

Continued prayers are being said for you here at our house. You have such stamina and so I know you can get through this awful journey. May God be with you every step of the way and may you soon be gardening and quilting!
Everyone cares about you!

Susannah

Allie said...

What fun to come home to! Kaaren, you are in my prayers, only two weeks, you can do it...I don't like hearing about the burns, I'll be praying especially about those. Remember it's always darkest just before the dawn...sending you big hugs, dear Kaaren!

Merilyn said...

Wow! Kaaren, what a wonderous table of love you came home too! Thankyou for sharing what Jean had written, what kind and heartfelt words! You have been in my thoughts and I can hardly believe that these weeks have passed so quickly, but perhaps not as quickly as you would have liked LOL! I had marked on my calender the 2 March you had said your treatment would be completed, so good to see the end in sight.
Continued prayers and good thoughts for you Kaaren, indeed Spring is on the way for you in more ways than one aye! A big hug from downunder!

Terri in BC said...

It is so nice to see an update from you - I think of you often and send a little prayer. Enjoy all your goodies - you deserve them after all your free patterns you have so generously shared.

Karen said...

Kaaren-- thoughts and prayers continue to come your way.

We miss you being online - so know that when you are better we'll be thrilled to have you back.

Blessings...
Karen

MooseStash Quilting said...

If our hearts can lighten your load, know that there are many with you! Blessings to you. :-)

Marie said...

twi-bypitageMy sweet friend, your more than an inspiration to us all. WE send our love and prayers to you and Mr. Painted Quilt too. Can I please have your physical address, please send i to my e-mail. Much love and hugs, Marie

Sandy said...

How wonderful for you!! You have shared so much of yourself and your talents with all of us, this is the least that we could do for you. Pray that your last 2 weeks will go fast for you and not give you too much discomfort. Hugs from Ohio.

Karen said...

Glad you get to come home for the weekend. Hope the goodies provide the smile we intended.

Hope Mr Painted Quilt is ok, and in good spirits.
Its hard being the spouse of a “C” patient. You worry, and do everything you can being supportive, and at the same time feeling scared, and worried. And meanwhile everyone is taking care of the patient.

Please give Mr Painted Quilt a hug and kiss for me. I was the spouse.

Wishing you both a smooth and quick two weeks.

Terry said...

What wonderful goodies you got! That pile ought to keep you busy for quite some time! I love the angel too! Thinking of you always Kaaren and keeping you in our prayers! :0)

Lurline said...

Bless you Kaaren - you are forever in my thoughts.You are following down the road I travelled in 1998 - there was a wonderful life at the end of it!
Big hugs - Lurline♥

Neabear said...

Wow! Boy did I get the goose bumps reading your post. How wonderful for you to know that you are loved so much by your blogging friends. That is wonderful! I pray the rest of your healing journey goes as smooth as possible. Hang in there. You WILL make it. Look forward to seeing more posts and projects from you as you are able.

~Linnea

Jenny's Craft Place said...

Fingers crossed the next couple of weeks go quickly and well for you. Happy crafting, Jenny

Vickie said...

It's so kind of you to let us know how you are! Thank you for that and always know I am praying for you and keeping you in my thoughts!
With lots of hope, prayers, and hugs
Vickie

quiltgrammy said...

Hi Kaaren, so glad to hear from you this weekend and to think you are 2/3rds of the way through your treatments,stay strong.Thoughts and prayers continue for you and your family.

Carrie P. said...

Yes, you have made it this far and you can do it till the end.
Hugs!

Rita said...

I'm praying for you!

Alice I. said...

Karen, you've made my day! I check my blog roll often in hopes that I will find a new post from you. Today, there it was.....an update! Here's hoping these last few weeks fly by quickly! Hang in there, Kaaren! I continue to pray for your recovery! hugz!

edyB said...

So glad you're on the downhill of this journey ... two more weeks!
Just keep thinking about Spring and renewal!
Sending along lots of positive thoughts.

Sandra said...

Kaaren,
We are all lifting you up in our prayers.
Spring will be here soon, and you'll be out there planning your flower beds and enjoying the beautiful Nova Scotia coastal air.
Blessings and hugs to you.

roccagal said...

You are loved by many and this is testament to your generosity and the fact that you are quite wonderful! You remain in my thoughts and prayers!

Elzaan said...

Hi Kaaren! Glad to know you are still going strong. I you ever thought you were going through this alone...think again! We are all here for you, and are still praying and thinking of you. Best of luck for the last two weeks. You're almost done!

Anonymous said...

Kaaren, so good to hear from you. I continue to pray for you, and wish you speedy recovery. Right now I am on holiday in Yuma, Arizona and borrowed a computer to log on and see how you are doing. Keep up the good spirits and good luck. Beth from northern Alberta

Rhonda said...

How awesome for you to receive all that LOVE! Praying you get through the last of your treatments alright, and things will be better after. Enjoy your gifts! Much love.

whistlebet57 said...

Kaaren, Thank you for your bright outlook on a very scary journey. You encourage me with your courage to fight this awful disease. My prayers continue for you and for your family

JessicaSews said...

I am so happy to see that 'Pile of Love" for you!!!

You are in our prayers. I am praying for all the discomforts of your treatments settle down and disappear.

Hugs!
Hugs!
Hugs!

Maureen said...

Just a few more days and you will be finished with this process and back home. I hope all is going well. Prayers are still with you. Miss you!

Susan said...

Dearest Kaaren, stopped by to say you are in my thoughts and prayers. So nice to see you have many many friends walking beside you on this journey. Hugs, Susan

Gmama Jane said...

"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord.
"Plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you A Hope and a FUTURE.
Jeremiah, 29:11 NIV

God's Word says it ALL.
Hugs and Blessings to you Kaaren
Gmama Jane

Gran - Knot-y Embroidery Lady said...

I care about you and send a prayer for your peace. Rest between "bouts" of nausea and fatique (I know what else is there to do but rest) yet allowing yourself to rest will strengthen your body and you will one day play in the dirt again and feel the sun your back. If you can look out onto trees even though they are barren right now, and let your mind rest, you will find a great blessing and peace will be able to attend you. You are and can do this. Hugs

Anita - Vlijtige Handjes said...

I'll sent you love and light for the way you have to go.

Kate/Massachusetts said...

Each day I check your blog and say a prayer for your recovery. Who would've imagined cyber prayers a decade ago! I hope this is the end of your treatment and you are home and on the road to recovery!